Death Records Now

Punctuation/clarity/etc
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Good Morning Craig,

On Thursday, July 2, I spoke with "JOHN SMITH" who is the public records department supervisor in the Fresno division located at 1028 W. Avenue J2, Fresno, California 93534, telephone number: (XXX) XXX-6446.

"JOHN" said the easiest way to avoid continuous notarizations/drafting letters/miscellaneous problems, would be to write a notarized letter to the department he is in, stating that I work for you. He did not specify the details of a work title or description, as long as it shows that you are giving me permission to pull the death record(s), along with the statement that you are an attorney that is litigating the (multiple) decedents estate.

Along with the notarized letter to his department, he requested that you have the (attached document) “Certificate of Identity” form signed and notarized.

He said he will need to keep these two original documents on file so that each time I go in, they can pull these documents, to give us instant access to a certified death certificate copy. I think it would be best if you handed the documents over to my dad/myself, instead of mailing them to their office. I don’t know how functionable their mail system really is. As soon as I receive it from you, I will drive straight to Lancaster and meet with John.

If you have any questions, feel free to call me at 559/ 696-XXXX.

Thanks,

Pocahontas

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PS: I have been working with him for years, so we work on a very casual level (IE: not using the title of "MR" etc)

Seems fine to me. I suggest you go on a government website and confirm John’s name and job title so you don’t have to put "JOHN" in quotes. If you are sure of his identity then drop the quotes, it implies that you really don’t believe that was his name.

Punctuation/clarity/etc
==========================
Good Morning Craig,

On Thursday, July 2, I spoke with "JOHN SMITH" who is the public records department supervisor in the Fresno division located at 1028 W. Avenue J2, Fresno, California 93534, telephone number: (XXX) XXX-6446.

"JOHN" said the easiest way to avoid continuous notarizations/drafting letters/miscellaneous problems, would be to write a notarized letter to the department he is in, stating that I work for you. He did not specify the details of a work title or description, as long as it shows that you are giving me permission to pull the death record(s), along with the statement that you are an attorney that is litigating the (multiple) decedents estate.

Along with the notarized letter to his department, he requested that you have the (attached document) “Certificate of Identity” form signed and notarized.

He said he will need to keep these two original documents on file so that each time I go in, they can pull these documents, to give us instant access to a certified death certificate copy. I think it would be best if you handed the documents over to my dad/myself, instead of mailing them to their office. I don’t know how functionable their mail system really is. As soon as I receive it from you, I will drive straight to Lancaster and meet with John.

If you have any questions, feel free to call me at 559/ 696-XXXX.

Thanks,

Pocahontas
PS: I have been working with him for years, so we work on a very casual level (IE: not using the title of "MR" etc)

It is very clear, concise and professional. Absolutely fine to send I think.